We've been together for so very long
But now things are changing oh I wonder what's wrong
Seems you don't want me around
The passion is gone and the flame's died down
I guess I lost a little bit of selfesteem
That time that you made it with the whole hockey team
You used to think
I was nice
Now you tell all your friends that I'm the Antichrist
Oh why did you disconnect the brakes on my car
That kind of thing that's hard to ignore
Got a funny feeling you don't love me anymore

I knew that we were having problems when
You put those piranhas in my bathtub again
You're still the light of my life
Oh darling
I'm begging
Won't you put down that knife
You know
I even think it's kind a cute the way
You poison my coffee just a little each day
I still remember the way that you laughed
When you pushed me down the elevator shaft
Oh if you don't mind me asking this poisonous cobra
Doing in my underwear drawer
Sometimes I get to thinking you don't love me anymore

You slammed my face down on the barbecue grill
Now my scars are all healing but my heart never will
You set my house on fire
You pulled out my chest hairs with an old pair of pliers
Oh you think
I'm ugly and you say
I'm cheap
You shave off my eyebrows while I was asleep
You drilled a hole in my head
Then you dumped me in a drainage ditch and left me for dead
Oh you know this really isn't like you at all
You never acted this way before
Honey something tells me you don't love me
Anymore oh no no
Got a funny feeling you don't love me anymore